There are times when I cannot stand my own emotions. I get angry with myself for having them, and then that anger turns outward, and I can say or do things I don’t feel good about. Thankfully, my daily mindful practice helps me with this.
A Day of Anger
I had a rough day recently, where I felt an enormous amount of resentment and anger triggered by something very trivial. It consumed me for the entire day. That Sunday, I spent the day alone, meditating, listening to Abraham Hicks, and soothing my difficult emotions. It was not a great day, and I didn’t feel very good about what I was feeling, but I tried to give it space and let it be rather than resist it, which is my typical response.
Silencing My Emotions
I also experienced some frustrating technical difficulties with my computer and other devices, and I felt like I was being punished for feeling angry. That thought is right in line with my typical mindset of “I shouldn’t feel this way.” Often I do not want to give my emotions a voice. I want to stamp them out and keep myself from feeling them.
Thankfully, I can hear these subtle messages when I am being mindful. Noticing these hurtful messages is the first step in being able to change them. After hearing myself think a few times, “I shouldn’t feel this way,” I pondered why. Why didn’t I have the right to feel angry or hurt? Why was I trying to censor myself from feeling something? I did some tapping to get to the root of it and cleared out the trigger that caused it. What I discovered was some old habits, thinking patterns, feelings, and leftovers from the past. I hadn’t fully explored them or cleared out the trauma yet. My tapping on that particular Sunday did that for me.
Give Your Emotions a Some Space
The day I was consumed with anger, I stayed away from everyone and didn’t take an action that could be hurtful or that I would feel bad about later. I have heard many great spiritual leaders talk about how if we ignore or suppress difficult emotions, they are only going to resurface louder. So I tried to give these very uncomfortable emotions some space. I just let it happen, and as always, it passed. The next day, I felt a lot better. I think if I had pushed my emotions down and struggled with them, they would have fought me, and perhaps they wouldn’t have passed as quickly or easily.
It’s a Hard World, But That Doesn’t Mean We Shouldn’t Try to Be Better
We live in a harsh world, and it’s difficult when you are dealing with anger and strong emotions to control your actions. I think the most important thing is to try each day to do better. Don’t let your emotions get the best of you, and don’t let them dictate your actions. If you allow hate and anger to make you do something hurtful to someone else, you may regret it later. Instead, try just being alone with your emotions and letting them pass.
States of high emotion are great opportunities to explore what makes us tick and why we do and think the way we do. Some mindful practices such as meditation, taping, or even reading spiritual texts might open up the doorways to solutions or a different method of thought.
I hope you will all join me in hesitating before taking action when you are angry, frustrated, or caught up in your own emotions. Some things you can’t take back and this world needs a bit more compassion and understanding and less reactivity.