We all struggle daily with a lot of challenges. Finding peace can feel more remote than ever before. Thankfully, I have found a solution to feel peaceful even amid the chaos: radical acceptance.
Mindful Living for Peace
Mindful living means slowing down and living each moment to its fullest. It’s not easy. I meditate at least twice daily; still, it feels impossible some days to slow down and be in the present moment. My mind races with thoughts, worries, and dozens of solutions to problems I didn’t even know I had.
Meditation and EFT help slow me down, and that is where I find peace most often. The feeling of being comfortable without needing anything to change is fantastic. The big takeaway from most meditations is that the goal is to accept whatever is in your current experience without judgment or needing it to change. It sounds fine, but in practice, it can be tricky. It’s much easier to practice when life is going well, and you don’t have much to worry about.
What About During Pain or Chaos?
Finding peace can feel impossible when living with pain or dealing with a stressful situation. But, if you can find a few quiet moments and slow your breathing, you can catch glimpses of peaceful moments.
I have found that radical acceptance and letting go of everything (even the seemingly important stuff) brings enormous peace, especially when life is chaotic.
The other day, for no reason whatsoever, I started feeling fear. It grew until it was close to a panic. Nothing was happening in my life to cause it, but here it was. I immediately snapped into action and went to my meditation space, slowed my breathing, and turned on a Calm meditation to soothe my nerves. Within a few minutes, I felt better.
Radical Acceptance is the Key to Peace
The key here is that I didn’t resist the fear or start telling myself a story about why I was having it. That’s one of my biggest problems. If I am not present in the moment, I can let my mind run wild about the “why,” and that’s not healthy for me. By making up a story about it, I allow it to continue instead of letting it pass by.
Radical acceptance can help in your relationships, too. When your teenager is acting out, instead of “reacting,” consider not reacting at all. Try to let it go completely. You can always address it later when both of you are calm. By not responding, you take back control of your emotions and your actions.
I am not saying that acceptance is easy; it’s not. But the rewards are hugely beneficial if you can.
I used to be very reactive, and I felt like accepting another person’s bad behavior gave them a pass. I didn’t like anyone getting away with anything. That’s not a healthy mindset, not for me. Letting go and accepting even the most challenging things frees you!
Radical Acceptance in Action
My boyfriend used to be late always. As the minutes ticked by, I would get angrier and angrier, and as the fury built, I would think things like, “He doesn’t respect me,” or “Our relationship is not important to him.” All this because he was late. It was simply poor time management skills on his part. In truth, it had nothing to do with me. But I turned it into something so much larger and hurtful to us both.
Now, if my boyfriend is late, I don’t even notice. I have completely accepted that part of him and don’t react at all. That’s healthy radical acceptance, it gives me the peace I want in my life.
Try exercising some radical acceptance in your life and see what happens. Let me know how it turns out.